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  • MM|
  • Advice
  • September 22, 2013

7 Express Ways To Lose A Girl You Like!

  1. Get all flirty with all her friends. Oh yes the best way to show a girl you care is by getting all her friends to your side. Go on, flirt with them, tell them they are hot just like her, buy them drinks too and dance with them in front of her to show your fun side. Share the attention between her and her friends that’s exactly the kind of man she wants; one who gets up close and personal with her girls.
  2. Get her number from a mutual friend without her knowledge. You were at the same social event with her for more than four hours; You said nothing to her; And the morning after, when she doesn’t remember your face, suddenly you’re Mr. Lover Boy…bombarding her WhatsApp with unflattering selfies at 6.30 am, talking about “I like the way those thighs looked last night…Guess who.” Like …??? wtf?
  3. You figure out she is not that into you. But Never Give Up! Beg her to go on a date with you and when she finally says ok, yea show up in your work clothes. And don’t even try to freshen up.  It’s nothing serious right? You’ll just tell her that you were very busy you didn’t have time to impress her, after begging for so long. Season the night by telling her you had a heavy lunch at work and your still very satisfied so you won’t be eating tonight, you’ll just buy her food and watch her pretty face eat…classic!
  4. Now that it’s just the two of you and you have a chance to get to know each other, talk about yourself the whole time. Don’t give her a chance, don’t ask her any questions, her life doesn’t exist. And don’t forget to boast how you have been to France, Egypt, South Africa, Germany, London, Australia, and the North Pole. Also tell her about your $90,000 BMW and your Tom Ford suits…because that’s all women want to hear.
  5. The bill is in! look at the total for a good five minutes, call the waiter back, question about the prices of the food, jokingly ask the girl for her contribution, then reject her ‘sincere’ offer by telling her you can’t let her spend the ‘little she has’ on such an expensive lifestyle. As the waiter walks away, remind her of the privilege she is having to be at this restaurant because you have never brought any of your other dates to such expensive places. Oh how lucky she is!
  6. Ok maybe first date went great. So great you two have been texting endlessly for the past two days a second date has been set in place. This girl is perfect you really see yourself with her. Oh yea she is super-hot too and you’re afraid another guy might snatch her while you’re asleep so you decide to drop the bomb on date number two, “I see you and me getting married.”
  7. Just in case first date went as earlier planned; Drop her home in your BMW, let her open her own door, wave her bye and tell her to ‘Call You.’ That went perfect didn’t it? She should be head over heels in love with you so yes, wait on her phone call…you’re going to be waiting for the rest of your sorry life.

Every girl has had at least one of these tragedies happen to her. All this mess usually ends up in the girl changing the name in her contacts list from ‘New Guy’ to ‘Never Pick Up.’ Guys, its simple, good girl catches your eye, keep it low key. Give her all the attention. You’re trying to impress her but you’re playing hard to get? Unless you’re ‘Micheal Ealy’ I will never understand how that works. Confidence is attractive. Walk up and say hello. Don’t whisper creepy things in her ear, just say hello, and take it from there. And if selfies must be sent, let the receiver know beforehand…look good in them and please wear a shirt. This ain’t a freak show!

If she has offered you her time, take some time and look good. I’d rather a guy who shows up late because he was cleaning up that one who shows up with a shiny sweaty face and stale cologne. If you make plans for something, participate in the plans. Guys, please quit showing off in front of women. You don’t need to prove anything. A girl just needs to take one look at your shoes, car (and the level of your gas tank) and she will have placed you in your rightful financial bracket. Don’t be weird and don’t have a mega ego. Professing your love too early shows how desperate you are and making a girl fell like she’s nothing will send her running. Be cool…open doors, give simple compliments and ask about her passions. It’s really the simple things.

And finally…I saved his for last. Guys, if you find a woman who has her own job, and her own car, pays her own bills and rent, and still manages to live comfortably; before you start acting like superman, put into consideration that this woman has been holding up on her own before you. Respect that and keep it in thought, before you go around telling her how lucky she is to be experiencing such a lifestyle. You don’t know what kind of lifestyle she has been living.  She could even be living a better lifestyle than you’re offering and look at you out here embarrassing yourself.

Starting a relationship is not just about impressing a woman. It’s more about getting to know each other. She might look like what you want but the real ‘her’ might not be what you’re looking for. So while you’re putting your game upfront, leave some space for her to reveal herself. You could end up saving yourself some time…and money.

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Categories: Advice, Wellness Tags: guys, humor, Love, relationship advice

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